Left 4 Dead: An Infection That Blossomed Their Lov
by zombieangel26
Summary: The four survivors have found refuge at a local mall near Mercy Hospital but have to rest there until they can recover from all previous infected attacks. But even being together for so long can have its effects on people as well...
1. Chapter 1

**Left 4 Dead: An Infection That Blossomed Their Love**

**Part 1: Hannah Montana**

**This is the first Fanfic by my lovely friend Rebecca and I so please forgive us for spelling or grammar. We are newbies at this. And just for forewarning, this is just for fun so have your imagination open! (That was ridiculously said but was needed)**

"Louis, get your black ass over here!" yelled Francis.

"Only if you pound it, baby!" exclaimed Louis excitedly.

Francis ran to Louis, impatiently, and said, " Only if you have the lube."

"Are you kidding me?!" said Louis, who was genuinely offended, "I always have lube, silly! Who the fuck do you think I am??"

"Well, as long as you have it!" said Francis retorted back,"....I can't wait any longer though!" Francis then pulled off Louis' sparkle Hannah Montana short shorts*, but then a Hunter came bursting in.

"Aghlabananana!" growled the Hunter loudly, "I wants a tickle fight to the death, BITCHES!"

"What the hell!?, screamed Louis, who decided to start running...only to trip and fall on his face because of his sparkle short shorts around his ankles. Francis quickly grabbed an auto-shotgun that was right next to him and began to shoot at the Hunter. Francis then yelled while shooting, " "Oh hell no! I'm the only one who's tickling Louis tonight!" The Hunter went down, and so did Francis on Louis.

Bill and Zoey were going around the area of the mall making sure it was safe, while Francis and Louis were "making their rounds". Bill knew of their secret love, but being slightly old-fashioned man, really hated it. "God damn that Hannah Montana making everyone gay, I blame her for this, " Bill thought to himself. Zoey then called Bill over, snapping him out of his gay-hating thoughts. Bill came up next to Zoey then THERE SHE WAS. She had long fake blonde hair and torn sparkle clothing on....it was Hannah Montana. They both heard her cry, but it wasn't a moan or sob, but her one-hit wonder, _The Best of Both Worlds_.

"We have the best of both worlds..."cried Hannah.

Bill, not thinking straight, immediately readied his Uzi then proceeded to shoot her, while foaming at the mouth, saying, "YOU GAY-LOVING CREATOR!" The Witch Bitch then stopped singing instantly, sprang up and starting throwing microphones at Bill. She soon ran out of microphones then proceeded to claw Bill.

Zoey was trying to shoot her too but aiming unsuccessfully. Bill then shot her right in the vocal chords and head, then said, "Who has the best of both worlds now, bitch?!"

*Idea of Hannah Montana clothing from xxBEjrtnfTHxx

Please review :-)


	2. Chapter 2

**Part 2: Love Revealed**

"OMG OMG OMG!" cried Louis, while flailing his arms and still attempting to walk with his sparkly short shorts at his ankles.

Bill quickly hid Hannah Montana's body behind a rotting plotting plant, knowing what effect it might have on Louis. Louis had an obsession with Hannah Montana and seeing her dead would kill him. But it was too late...

"Um, what. is. THAT?!!" screamed Louis, his big brown eyes becoming shiny with fresh tears. That blonde hair and sparkly clothing looked all too familiar to Louis. Then he realized, that body behind the rotting plotting plant was HANNAH MONTANA!

"YOU!" cried Louis, pointing at Bill, "How could you do this to me?!"

Bill then tried to explain in his old- man gruff voice, "God damn it, she was a witch and she made all them people gay with her "pop music"!" Bill's eyes were fierce and angry. "Louis, I know about you and Francis! and it hurt..."

They all looked at Bill with confused eyes.

"You hurt me Louis," continued Bill, "You hurt me when you got together with Louis....making me hate any gay person...because I wanted you!"

Zoey and everyone else looked at Bill with a shocked expression. But then Zoey walked up to Bill and slapped him across the face. "How could YOU?" She asked. They all turned to Zoey confused.

"I LOVE LOUIS!" exclaimed Zoey. They all couldn't help but stare at her. I mean, have you seen him?!" she continued, "Those big, sexy eyes...that chocolate skin..."

~this was about to get awkward~

Louis , who still had his Hannah Montana sparkly short shorts at his ankles, said, "Damn, I knew I was damn fine, but DAMN!"

Francis decided then to jump into the conversation, "EVERYONE BACK THE FUCK OFF!!" he said protectively, "This man is mine only! Everyone try to plow MY man will get a shotgun blast to the face!"

Louis stared at Francis in disbelief, "You really mean that?!"

"Of course I do baby." Francis met Louis' glare with his blue eyes, "....I love you Louis!!!"

Little blue diamonds came rolling down Louis' cheeks, "Francis, you're the only hard-ass for me." Louis then embraced Francis in the most homo way by picking him up then spinning him around. "Baby boy, " said Louis, "Let's be together FOREVAR!"

They each smiled with twinkles in their eyes then skipped off to go back to the van they were originally behind.

Bill and Zoey just stared, gaping, and shocked at what had just happened.

As soon as the couple disappeared behind the van, Francis backhanded Louis. "Have you been encouraging them, Louis?! yelled Francis.

"WHAT! Honey bunches, you know you're the only for me!" said Louis as he was ripping open his white button shirt, revealing a blood and cum stained Zac Efron t-shirt.

Francis stood staring at the shirt, "You know I love that shirt you wear, " saying seductively

~cue the porn music~


	3. Chapter 3

**Part 3: Zac Efron and Weed**

"God damn it, God damn it!" yelled Bill, "Damn, rotting zombies!" Bill had just tripped over the body of Zac Efron.

"Bill, it's just a body of..." Zoey looked closely at the rotting body, that hair...those biceps then she realized who it was, "MY FAVORITE IDOL!" Zac Efron had been her idol since the first preview of High School Musical came out. She then started flailing her arms and foaming at the mouth, yelling, "Ahgahabananana!"

Zoey, calm down!" Bill said frantically. Zoey just kept yelling like a rabid weasel and was about to attack Bill when something caught her foot.

IT WAS ZAC EFRON! He had turned into a smoker. His tongue began to wrap around her body and began to drag her, when Bill pulled out a hunting rifle and began shooting Zac Efron.

The smoker then began to make a guttural sound from his thorax that slowly vibrated everyone's surroundings. It was getting more intense by the second when smoke suddenly started oozing out of Zac's bullet holes. More and more smoke began filling the air until suddenly Zac exploded.

Zoey then knew that her idol was no more.

~dramatic music~

*****

The four survivors left the mall, and went straight to Mercy Hospital. The Hospital had crashed ambulances, broken windows and doors and the occasional hideous, white van. The air was saturated with strained awkward silence. And Louis and Francis constantly holding hands didn't help.

"Can you two stop being fags for five seconds?!" screamed Bill as he turned around to face the couple.

"Uhh, "said Louis, "Didn't you confess your love for me like five hours ag--FUCK!BOOMER!" Louis grabbed his dual pistols as a fat Boomer vomited all over Zoey.

"EWWIE! Anybody got any Irish Spring soap™?!" yelled Zoey.

Bill grabbed Zoey by her slimy arm and handed her an automatic shotgun, "Get ready," he said.

Louis fired his pistols, just as one of his bullets went through the Boomer's bloated eye. Louis then screamed, "BOOM! Headshot! I can dance all day! I can dance all day! Try and hit me!" The boomer slammed to the ground, crushing a few members of the horde, who were consistently multiplying. The horde was coming from all angles, but that was not their main concern because a Tank was coming towards them. The tank looked familiar to Francis...it looked like his mom. Those leopard pants...that silver-blue hair, and that special tattoo that said, "FUCKING HARDCORE MOM", it was his mom.

"I'm gonna grab YO CHEEKS!" yelled the Tank.

"Not today, fat bitch!" Francis half-heartedly. Francis then grabbed and Molotov close by and threw it at his overly gigantic mom. An instant hit! The Tank began to frantically wave her arms up and down, yelling, "Aghghabananana!" She tried to stop the flames that were surrounding her bulbous body by rolling on the ground but it was no good.

After thirty seconds of burning alive?...dead?..whatever, she hit the ground, making the floor collapse around the four survivors. They quickly ran into a nearby room and locked the door.

"It's dark in here, " said Louis girly.

"Turn on your flashlight, you damn dirty ape! " yelled Bill.

They all soon had their flashlights on when Zoey spotted something on a table. Zoey picked it up and looked at it with HUGE eyes. "DUDE! I FOUND WEED! SCHWING!" she said excitely, "Now it's time to chillax." Zoey pulled out a lighter and a piece of paper she had in her pockets and started smoking it.

"Dude, you have got to try this!" she said cooly. They all joined in and began talking nonsense...

"Okay, so this one time, I had this guy over and he took off my pants and began thrustin--" Bill then cut Zoey off saying, "Whoa wait! I got a better one!"

They all shared stories with one another until they fell asleep.


End file.
